The Ashlar Company
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The Compass Of His Attainments
I've told you the tale of his Lordship
And the tramp he took home to his wife,
To show what could happen to some-one
Who never had sinned in his life.
It turned out the tramp's name was 'enery,
And his father had been on the square
And he was conceived on the Friday
When his father was put in the chair.
A Lewis, by gad said his Lordship,
And how did you come to be there
On the pavement outside of the Temple
With nothing half decent to wears
Said 'enery, I talked with me mother
Before she was took to her bed,
She talked of one thing and another,
And here's what the old lady said:
I can't tell you much of your father,
Except he was some kind of gent
Who I met in the Ďall in Great Queen Street,
-The one where the Masons all went.
So when the old lady departed
And left me to fend for meself,
I took to the road broken hearted,
And thought of me father's great wealf.
Now'enery 'ad 'eard about Masons,
How they were responsive and kind,
So he parked himself there on the pavement
And waited until they 'ad dined.
At this his Lordship looked pensive,
And started to work out the dates
Since the time of his own installation
When he went to the call with his mates.
You know how his Lordship had found him
And taken him home in the car,
But the Lady refused to receive him.
Well, you know what Ladyships are!
So his Lordship made his arrangements,
And set him up nice, in a flat,
With a pension to feed and to clothe him,
And you couldn't want better than that.
Now 'enery began to get restive
When he thought what his life could be like,
And he started to take driving lessons
So his Lordship bought him a bike.
But soon he was asking the questions,
Being free, and at least twenty-one
And he rode off to tackle his Lordship,
Who told him what had to be done.
Well, the time came for 'enery's acceptance
The date had been fixed in advance
The secretary did all the homework,
And the Master left nothing to chance.
But when 'enery got on his cycle,
-All dressed in his best quite a swell,
He found that the chain had departed
And the brakes were asunder, as well.
Now the road to the Temple was easy,
It ran down the side of the slope,
They tied up the brakes w'th some sisal,
And coasted off down full of hope.
Well he got there in time for the ritual,
But he asked at the festive board
How the Master had known that he entered
Of his own free wheel and a cord!
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